why am i on earth

i came to hurt people as much as i can
i pushed them
i punished them for reason they cant accept
i killed their feeling and sensibility

then

i came to see myself breaking
feeling so hurt and hurt
knowing that no one can save me..

i just want to be held all day and i dont have apparent reason for that.
but i guess i just dont deserve...

sunday sunset

we had a special sunday yesterday.. we went to beach for my holga session. there will be an exhibition for holga, and i want to join. :D we took little oni (my neighbour) to ancol..

too bad, the sun didnt stay long enough for us.. its getting dark and i just hope my holga shoot didnt went too bad. ._. anw, its been a lovely sunday..

shanty birthday

last nite after work we went for dinner. it was shanty's and lina's birthday celebration. the roti bakar was delicious. i love it.. when its time to go home, the rain was pouring so hard that i can even walk to my car. hmm its november which is a time to welcome rainy dayss... ^^

book fair

by and i were very excited when we knew JCC held a book fair. we went there yesterday,, it was so so crowded.. because there were 3 exhibitions held altogether.


on the first corner that we visit, we found a super cool pop up book.. originally it was 10% discount but then we found another same book but with a little scratch on the cover and it was 50% disc.. ** happy.. yet the book still cost 200k something.. @@ but by said its a good investment for us.. ^^ and by was suddenly full of spirit for book hunting..


at first, i didnt plan to pick any book. because i thought it will be better getting it on bookmooch.. sending away books that i dont read anymore in return for a book i want.. ^^ but then when i saw a cookery mags sale ( 10k for 3mags), i couldnt resist my self.. and i bought six of them.. *o* uh ohhh..

after work shopping

last nite by and i went to artha gading because i receive an email from the executive that they are having an 80 % sales. *excited.. but sadly didnt get anything there.. when we stepped out, i saw a very cute duck figurine and i thought mom will love it so i bought one..



i then accompanied by having his dinner.. while waiting for the noodle, we played nds together..





on our way home, i saw a cute batik pouch and i said to by,,"beliin yak?".. by: "brapaan?".. me:"goceng".. by:"ya udahhh".. hahaha... *happy.. but as we walked away, i realized that the pouch is not well stitched.. so we went back to exchange and tadaaaa,, it my nu hp pouch...



hwaa its been a tiring nite coz we still went for grocery shopping until 10.. by sent me home and i sleep sweetly until 7.20.. ARRGGGGHH!!! i miss morning prayer n got no time for cooking.. @@ anw,, i enjoyed little shopping on weekday.. ^^

my cousin

i have a cousin named sunny. we used to lived together for six years i think. but we havent talked as much as we do now.. we chatted almost everyday in office. talking a lot of stuff from a light chat to a deep conversation though he talked mostly 70% i guess.. ^^ so here's a little chat of us today :

(02:57:10 PM) cosco cosco: I learn a lot from your dad
(02:57:14 PM) cosco cosco: At least he inspired me
(02:57:23 PM) cosco cosco: Cos many things we different
(02:58:08 PM) scott_ry: ouu hahaha
(02:58:09 PM) cosco cosco: He dont educate directly
(02:58:19 PM) scott_ry: kliatan ny doank jujur
(02:58:22 PM) scott_ry: pdhallllll
(02:58:23 PM) cosco cosco: But i think God using your family
(02:58:34 PM) cosco cosco: Padahal lebay yach
(02:58:35 PM) cosco cosco: Hahahaha
(02:58:44 PM) cosco cosco: Honest cing,so far
(02:58:52 PM) cosco cosco: I like your family atmosphere
(02:59:03 PM) cosco cosco: Inspite of the minus
(02:59:14 PM) cosco cosco: Better than anyother family
(02:59:30 PM) cosco cosco: Too bad, your mom only got 2 child
(02:59:32 PM) cosco cosco: hahahaha
(03:00:01 PM) scott_ry: hahahahaha
(03:00:05 PM) scott_ry: masa seh?
(03:00:23 PM) scott_ry: i think my family biasa aza
(03:00:29 PM) scott_ry: hahaaha
(03:00:35 PM) cosco cosco: Well i dont see your dad method special
(03:00:41 PM) scott_ry: org2 nya cuek2 seh ya
(03:00:52 PM) cosco cosco: But just consider it as a god gift
(03:00:56 PM) cosco cosco: Bukan cuek
(03:01:17 PM) cosco cosco: Cm harmonis, i dun know this word mean to u
(03:01:23 PM) cosco cosco: Tapi liat keluarga ko sin
(03:01:27 PM) cosco cosco: Keluarga medan gua
(03:01:43 PM) cosco cosco: Keluarga temen wa yg bapaknya ud stroke, dan 3 anak cewe
(03:01:47 PM) cosco cosco: Kepalanya panasan
(03:01:51 PM) cosco cosco: Keluarga bos gua
(03:02:03 PM) cosco cosco: Maybe, bener juga sich kata papa le
(03:02:12 PM) cosco cosco: Pengaruh mama le
(03:02:15 PM) cosco cosco: Tenang
(03:02:39 PM) cosco cosco: I never see your dad has a special method
(03:02:40 PM) cosco cosco: Hahahaha
(03:02:49 PM) scott_ry: hahahaha
(03:03:02 PM) scott_ry: yeah maybe yes
(03:03:11 PM) scott_ry: i have to be grateful
(03:03:22 PM) scott_ry: God give me a good family
(03:03:31 PM) scott_ry: sometimes i forget
(03:03:42 PM) cosco cosco: memang ada juga masing2 dr le org harus ngatasi masalah gejolak harapan dan obsesi masing2
(03:04:02 PM) scott_ry: yeah you can make ur family as u wanted qo
(03:04:06 PM) cosco cosco: At least , i think god never gave u a hard situation
(03:04:10 PM) cosco cosco: I hope
(03:04:17 PM) cosco cosco: So i have my philosophy
(03:04:32 PM) cosco cosco: I never run from trouble or disaster
(03:04:40 PM) cosco cosco: I believe when u run
(03:04:47 PM) cosco cosco: Trouble will accumulate
(03:04:57 PM) cosco cosco: And when u tired of running
(03:05:08 PM) cosco cosco: It hit you harder than it should
(03:05:17 PM) cosco cosco: Maybe, thats why
(03:05:20 PM) cosco cosco: Hahaha
(03:05:29 PM) cosco cosco: i know u try hard to understand this
(03:05:38 PM) cosco cosco: But everyting is so related
(03:05:43 PM) scott_ry: hahahaha..
(03:05:51 PM) cosco cosco: Omg
(03:05:56 PM) scott_ry: u know long words bother me
(03:05:59 PM) cosco cosco: Your cousin is soooooo
(03:06:02 PM) cosco cosco: Lebayyyy
(03:06:04 PM) scott_ry: need sumtime to digest it
(03:06:10 PM) cosco cosco: Hahahaha
(03:06:15 PM) scott_ry: coba tlg di jelasin lg
(03:06:16 PM) scott_ry: wahahaa

Be merciful as your Father is

Dear Father in heaven,

Father, please forgive me for being a person that dont understand how to give. what I have done today to the car insurance person, i knew it was wrong.. i was not trying to understand others,instead i was busy thinking for myself.

Father i thank you because you have set so many examples on how to give while you were still on earth..and You have given me so many blessings yet many times in my life, i forgot to be grateful. often i grumbled about my income,my life and so many things, please forgive me God.

Please help me to be more loving and merciful.

Thank Jesus..

sincerely,
your daughter

reunion in TA

its another high school reunion this year.. actually not an official reunion because one of my highschool mate, Theodora was celebrating her birthday and invited us to Pizza Hut.. ^^ it was sixteen of us.. i was very happy because i met my long lost friend. ivon.. she was just getting married last february. too bad i wasnt invited.. she said it was only a small party for family.. anw, im happy for her.. ^^ after lunch, we went for karaoke at Inul vista.. ^0^ i didnt stay untill it finish because my by pick me up earlier.. it's been a gud day.. hope to see each other soon.. ^^

weekend pudding

since by moved to pluit village,, i always spent my saturday night alone. at first, it was frustating.. i feel so bored and lonely.. but slowly i tried to plan my night.

sometimes i will watched movie.. but i find out that i dun really enjoy watching movie alone.. i get used to have by on my side. :p other nights i tried scrapbooking.. but scrapbooking get me bored easily.. :D so on these past few weeks, i try on a new thing,.. making puding.. it went from mango pudding, tofu pudding, mocca pudding and chocolate pudding for tonight.. it was fun trying on a new recipe.. and now i am thinking of making strawberry pudding for next week.. ^^

a red shoe

hello..its my red shoe arriving.. (^________^) thankfully, it fits sweetly on my big feet.. :D i was worrying it will not fit because the sizing chart confused me so i just pick my usual size. this shoe takes sometime to arrive,, since its handmade.. but anyway its worth the waiting.. ^^

btw, its a second shoe i ve bought this month.. should stop shopping before by complain i guess.... *sobs

a day off

we had a day off.. its so unplanned, i just know that i need a day off very much.. maybe because of the rough day on sunday.. Waking up this morning, i felt very bad.. and by called me asking whether i want to have a day off with him. of course yes.. i've been missing those times..

so here comess our day off.. before by arrive, i finished decorating my cupcake to be sent to my little neighbours, the trio V's (Valen, Velis, and Vioni). and i cooked daikon soup for dinner.. as by came, we watched 'before sunrise'. by and i love this movie.. and by said its one of his fave movie..

at first we plan to go to Ancol to capture sunrise with my holga. but we were too sick of the traffic.. we want our day off to be jam free.. ^^ so MOI here we come. by wanna go to the multi toys. but sadly, there is no dragon ball egg he's looking for.. also, i bring along my holga and wish could take few shoot around. ^^

we passed by yopie salon and by notice that it only costs 18k for a haircut.. and as the saloon girl asked him for a hair wash, i then said to by not to hair wash cos it will cost more.. wat a cheapskate.. ;p but the girl said the price is the same whether we want to have a hair wash or not which is 36k. the 18k displayed on the price list outside is for kid's cut.. we both rolled our eyes and its too late to cancel.. so by's having his 1st 36k hair cut. usually he went to barbershop. ;p



we then go to carrefour for grocery shopping. by stayed very long at the mags section coz all the movie mags there are unwrapped.. it was aroun 3 o'clock and we havent taken lunch yet.. so hungry but i dont wanna eat at MOI coz i want to eat my fave soto daging madura at MKG.. ^^ so MKG we go,, for lunch and for my birthdayyy shopping.. **excited..

its been a long discussion on what i want for my birthday.. it went from chair, suitcase, wardrobe, scrapbook kit, dress, so on and on.. but then i decided i want something that i can bring everyday and everywhere with me.. looks like furniture is not a good choice.. ;p so the list has been shorlisted between ring or watch.. and by said he prefer to buy me watch since my elle watch is quite old now. i then found a chic watch i always wanted in Swatch.. i love it so much.. thank my deariee.. its the best gift..


i put on the watch as by paid for it.. by said it looks lovely in my hand.. ^^ and its time to go home,.. im very tired yet very happy.. i love our day off.. im gonna sleep early tonite, take a sweet sleep and be ready for another working day.. thank my love for giving me a good day,.. help me to forget all the sadness i had before and replace it with a sweet memory.. he is definitely my favorite person in the world.. i love my bear always!

my 2nd cupcake

on my first cupcake making, the buttercream was failed.. i was like trying to mix up butter and water.. @@ so i give another try with the buttercream and with another recipe.. and i am so happy it tasted good.. ^^

i dont know about cake decorating,, so it just a simple twist with the spuit.. ;p but they turned out quite lovely, no? ^^

TA on thursday

its my best friend, widya second visit to jakarta. last nite we met up again in TA.. i was going to TA with william, widya's brother. it took us almost one and half hour from our office because of the traffic.. huuhh, it made me a little scared to go anywhere on the weekdays.. but anw, it worth to hang out with your best friend you dont get to see everyday or even every month. :D widya was with her hubby, made.. so four of us went for dinner at noodle cafe as soon as we arrived.. but the meal was suck. i order something called nancing chicken that tasted nothing except salty.. -_-


then we went to metro to find a shoe. i have a wedding party this weekend and got no shoe to wear with my dress. and after trying on some of them, i made up my mind with a sweet shoe from studio nine. i guess this shoe will be a gift from my cousin, Sunny. on my birthday last time sunny gave me cash as a birthday gift and asked me to buy myself a birthday gift. ^^


and initially we planned to meet moel on TA. but it didnt go as planned. so before going home, i took them to sour and sally to try out the new flavor, bublegum attack.. and it was 9.30 when we leave TA. william and i send widya and made back to kosambi. we had a nice talk on the way. it reminds me the time we used to be together back in high school. it was lots of fun. and it was a good nite too hanging out together last nite.. come again soon my dear friend.. ^^

a week of discourages

music has never been my specialty. but last year i decided to take a piano course. main reason was we ( dad, mom, bro and I) shared to buy a piano. i remembered i invest 4 mil for it.. ^^

playing piano been a challenge for me and it took me some time to start. and after sometime i enjoyed playing it.. it help me calm down from a stressful day. however i am still very far on knowing how to play it right.. it really hard for me to catch up with rhythm. and my short term concentration has always been a problem.

It was last week when i go for piano class, i felt so dumb and sad. i felt like there's no hope for me. and i was thinking to quit because maybe music just isnt my world. i havent practiced this week. but by always encouraged me, that he said even a prof has to practice very very hard to master it. so it needless to say that i gotta put more efforts on practicing. thank to my very supportive BF who always give me new spirit and of course to the almighty Lord Jesus who makes everything possible. ^^

and i found beautiful quotes that motivates me ,,

Being defeated is only a temporary condition; giving up is what makes it permanent.
-- Marilyn vos Savant

Don't be discouraged. It's often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock.
-- Author Unknown

It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.
-- Confucius

I don't wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has to get down to work.
-- Pearl Buck

Never, never, never, never give up.
-- Winston Churchill

We can do anything we want as long as we stick to it long enough.
-- Helen Keller

When the world says, "Give up,"
Hope whispers, 'Try it one more time.'
-- Author Unknown

download hard

recently, it hard to find a little free time to just sit down and have fun with my DS. coming home from office i gotta cook for dinner, since mom has went back to pontianak.. sad, but i'd really enjoy cooking.. it calms me in someway..

but i still believe that my DS is one of my precious investment. someday it will be a very good weapon on killing my boredom and time. ^^ based on that belief, i am downloading the rom very hard. and mostly in the office. *wink.

i found this really cool website call ROMulation and has been downloaded many many roms here.. hoho.. and will definitely keep downlading.. *big smile

2,5 years

its the 2.5 year we've been together.. our days were quite stable this few months. we spent our time together five days a week and by going home on weekend.. i really enjoy our time together.. we go to church each morning to pray(if we could wake up early :P). and i'd pray we could make it as our morning routine until many years from now.. then we would enjoy breakfast together and sometime he drive me to office.. what a beautiful start of a day..

in the evening,, after a full day in office, i would come home and wait for him. sometime i cook dinner or just practising piano.. then he would knock on my door and give me a big hug. :D on days that i wasnt too sleepy, we watched dvd together or we may just sit together doing our own things. anything we do, i love our nights together.. sometimes on special occasion like anniversary or birthday he would take me out.. mostly to mall nearby,, because we were sick of the traffic jam. we had dinner and go to book store or toy store for a window shopping.. ^^

all these little things that we do over and over again never get me bored.. i enjoyed every second of it because our togetherness is the sweetest thing ever. happy anniversary dearie! I love you.. always have and always will..

ps: by gave me this for our anniv.. :D

and its us in october..

a visit and a gift..

last week widya got a free trip to jakarta from Garuda. and we had a chance to meet up on thursday.. its nice to have a visit from a friend.. after office hour, we went to by office and by drove us to GI.. we had dinner together and go for a little window shopping and stopped by at Zara.. and widya bought me a white turtleneck shirt, she said its for my birthday,.. what a surprise.. ^^ thank dear friend..

thankful morning

by is more than a boyfriend for me. he sometimes acts like a father who give directions. like now, he helps me to build up a new habit. he called it " cute and bersyukur". funny, isnt it? =D

so every morning on our way to office, we had this thankful session. give thank for the beautiful morning and every good things of life. being thankful is beautiful. and the magic thing about it, is that once you start,, your list will keep growing and growing.. ^^ i do really hope we could make it as a habit as it is the will of the Lord Jesus. May God grant us a faithful heart to remember His word and obey it. ^^

Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus [ 1 thessalonians 5:18]

package from hongkong

as i came home yesterday,, i noticed a brown box on the dinner table.. its something from hongkong.. guess what? of course my little baby, holga 135 bc.. getting something from the mail is a very sweet thing.. its a perfect way to add up a smile to ur day.. ^^
however bad thing about free shipping is they use envelope instead of box to wrap ur order.. so the holga box is a bit misshaped.. *sobs.. but the cute thing is they still using stamps for shipment.. old fashioned yet lovely.. hihi..

On hold..

carousel studio is now on hold because new eagerness has arisen.. that's me.. a very impulsive woman.. for this case is baking.. ^^ after my first tried on cupcake, next day the kitchen was busy with pancake.. though the pancake was not as expected,, but rhe making was fun.. and tonight there will be another session for pancake try out at home. this sunday we'll be having 'ramah tamah' for the kids, so some of the teachers will come for a demo... hopefully tonight pancake will be a yummy one.. *pray.. ^^

failed..

i love trying out new recipe.. and when i found a pancake recipe this afternoon,, i couldn't wait to go home and mess with the kitchen.. ^^ this pancake seems easy to make,, just add up all the ingredients and mix them up.. there is no possibility of being failed i thought.. but over confidence always ended up sadly.. huhu.. my pancake didnt come out as expected.. its a bit too hard and the taste is too plain.. -_- but i will definitely keep trying because i love pancake and it makes a perfect breakfast.. ^^ acha acha..

dont have the small fried pan,, so its over sized pancake.. =P

with blueberry yogurt topping..

1st baked cake

16.00 - picked mom up at industri and rushed to toko ani at Gunsa I..

16.55 - Arrived at the store 5 mins before they closed.. Thank God.. ^^ and here are what i bought.,,


19.00 - arrived at home.. bathed and started messing up the kitchen..



22.00- voilaaaa... proudly present my first cupcake .. ^^

my first cake book

i wanna make cupcake.. the main idea was i wanna give some favor for friends and families on my birthday.. it seems too late now , but i still want to give it a try.. so i ended up ordering above books.. these are books published by NCC (Natural Cooking Club). the books are not bad,, it has many cupcake decorating ideas but only few techniques listed..

holga is on the way..

yippie,, last nite my dearie helped me to book my first lomo camera on ebay,,, been waiting for it since forever. . and in two weeks time this baby will be on my hand. ** excited.. thank mom for a wonderful gift.. ^^

start all over again

yesterday i turned 23. dun wanna talk about the birthday now. its been a roller coaster day.. blame me for being so selfish and childish. it strated since the holiday, we have skipped the morning time with Jesus for more than one week. we have forgotten how big thing it is. we ended the day without any grateful feeling. slowly we losing something that keep us in control. we passed the day with human strengh, thought it will be enough..

But there are times when God shows His love through punishment. through problems and tears, we are reminded that we are nothing but a helpless human being. we cant make things happen with our own strengh. and we cant overcome the disappointment and fear by ourselves. we need holy spirit to guide us, to accept things,to fight the bad feeling,and most importantly to be able to love...

yesterday was frustrating. no one have the power to change yesterday. But God can.He turns the frustrating day as a way back to Him, to His loving arm where peaceful resides. yes, God never stop giving us opportunity to start over again. i want to spend more time with Him, learn more about His words. i want to be a responsible person, in my serving at church, in my work, in my relationship. i want to be more loving to my loved one, my family, friends and anyone... through prayer,it will happen..

sleep at 11?

impossible! that was by statement this morning when i suggest him to sleep earlier.. he is a night person, happiest to stayed up very late,, occupied himself with many things to do and he claimed its his productive time. but i never came to understand it coz im worry for his health.. but now i lose the patience to talk about it nicely.. rather than hoping he will change his sleeping habit soon,, i wish he will get his iphone soon.. ^^

vintage paper

this little treasures are from mom. she has kept it for years and now its mine.. heart them.. ^^

holiday,, hoop hoop hooray..

holiday is peeking.. another half day work and,,, its here!!! (^__________^)

its an Idul Fitri season and we have 9 days off from office ( including weekend).. what a surprise,, coz last year as I remember we only given 2 days off.. the company mentioned it is an appreciation for our hard work. huh? no clue.. ;p

since its an unpredicted holiday, i have not much plan. other than working on my mini album projects, maybe will just hang out with family and friends.. also, i got some crafts project i want to try out.. may the holidays give me some craft times i've really wish i had all this long.. and lastly wishing everyone a happy holidays!!

the 1st to do list for the store..

♥ finish 5 mini albums
♥ bags / boxes for the album
♥ Set up store policy (how to order, payment method, shipping cost, etc)
♥ create logo and store banner
♥ making tags
♥ capturing the products
♥ upload the photos
♥ promote the shop

online store

when i tried to picture myself in a future, i always put myself as a person who work at home, creating things i love and selling them.. and i guess its time to make a first move (baby move?) so as to make my dream come true.. that is setting up a little online store. ^^

As a beginner, i will try to make some mini scrapbook album i've used to make. i love messing around with papers. i think it will be a fun project. ^^ as this coming week i will have a long holiday, im gonna use it for working on the mini albums. God please lead me through so i can get rid of my laziness..^^

for my tiny little company, i ve came out with few names like carousel studio, bits of life, boo little corner. cant decide it yet. there are still so many things to prepare, i'll come out with the list of what to do. if the Lord wills, hopefully everything will be ready by the mid of October.. Keep praying until it happens! Acha acha !

i love frozen yoghurt

on this sunday, by had to work.. and of course i had to be there.. ^^ becauseeee i want to get heavenly blush yoghurt with 20% disc.. hihi.. i never had frozen yoghurt before, the very first one i had was the sample of heavenly blush.. and i feel in love with it instantly..

and after few hours window shopping around alone, by pick me up and we rush to HB. we picked up ori+pome medium size yogurt with mango and lychee toppings, for only Rp.28.000,-. yuuumm,, lets enjoy..

.....

I wish i could just forget all the scholarship thing and any responsibilities the society sets for me... I wish i could live my life doing things i love.. i wish i can do my job passionately.. waking up everyday with a great feelings knowing its another days belong to me.. i really wish its not just my wishful thinking,, i do really hope someday dad will put aside all his judgements and give his sincere blessing and respect to my dream,, to my passion,, and to the life that i dream...

utilizing the blog

i found an interesting article about journaling from Steve Pavlina's blog. He is a writer for personal development. and i enjoy his writing. on his post about journaling, he mentioned three main benefits of journaling :

* Solve tricky problems. Some problems are very difficult to solve when you’re stuck in an associative, first-person viewpoint. Only when you record the situation and then re-examine it from a third-person perspective does the solution become clear. Sometimes the solution is so obvious that you’re shocked you didn’t see it sooner.
* Gain clarity. A great time to turn to your journal is when you’re just not clear about what to do. Should you quit your job to start your own business? Should you marry your current romantic partner? Are you on the right track financially? It’s amazing how much clearer things become when you explore them in writing.
* Verify your progress. It’s wonderful to go back and re-read journal entries from years ago and see how much real progress has been made. When you’re frustrated that your life doesn’t seem to be working out as you’d like, go back and read something you wrote five years ago — it will totally change your perspective. This helps you in the present moment too by reminding you that you are in fact growing and changing, even when it feels like you’re standing still.

interesting.. it really motivates me to keep journaling.. so i guess i will utilize my blog more ?.. ^^

Stuck again

Every year when i filled my scholarship form, i always end up being stress and stuck. It started on choosing the study field and all the questions related to it. hmmpphh.. I dont like my current field and I have no idea what field should i choose. what a pathetic person am I...

I dont wanna repeat the same mistake. doing something that not belong to my passion and end up in a place that dont belong to me just like now. i can clearly hear my heart says that i hate my job. and last night as i filled the application form, i was so confused whether it is a way out for me or not. i dont like all the field of study being offered. i was thinking about randomly choosing one of them, creating story on how it relates to me and how this benefits the country.. but all will be a lie.. and why doing it? i guess it just for the sake of somebody who doesnt truly understand and believe in me..

Applying scholarship

Dear God,

Thank for a beautiful life You had given me. You give me health, job and most importantly lovely people in my life. Your love passes human expectations and anything that I do could never be enough to thank You.

I believes You have a beautiful plan in me,, even when some times I have a doubt. For just like now, when I am about to apply scholarship. I have a big question and doubt in mind. I am worry how if I fail again? Should I be trying again next year? or will I be stuck on this field? But how if I pass? Will I be able to maintain my relationship with my loved one?

Please help me to believe You have the best answer for all my doubts and questions God. Help me to walk with faith and leave all my worries on You. Let me always walk in Your direction.

Thank God.

Sincerely,
Your daughter

Happy heart

this morning i had a little incident with by which coz me to lose control of myself and lose the joy in my heart. i know it was all my mistake.. i have no control over myself. but God is so good, He had given me someone that is so patient and understanding to be by my side.

and as i regretting what happen this morning, words of God came into my mind, give me new hope and courage,,

A happy heart is good medicine and a cheerful mind works healing, but a broken spirit dries up the bones
(Proverbs 17:22)

Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart
(Psalm 37:4)

A glad heart makes a cheerful countenance, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is broken
(Proverbs 15:13)

All the days of the afflicted are evil; but he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast
(Proverbs 15:15)

Anxiety in a man's heart weighs it down, but an encouraging word makes it glad
(proverbs 12:25)

God is so good and His love never fails.. Give thank and delight yourself in Him.

GZ, we r here..

arriving in GZ Baiyun International Airport around 9.00 p.m.. we were taking airport express line 5 to Haizhu square. It costs us RMB 20 /person.. much much cheaper than the airport information centre offer us for a taxi ride which cost RMB 180. huh.. Remind me to be more careful so as not to gulled.. ^^ We then catch taxi to Lido hotel for RMB 8 (minimum taxi fare in GZ). It was still crowded on the hotel on 10.30 pm when we arrived.

the receptionist first question was ,, how many people staying? and I handed him all of our passports. then it was a problem since we booked a two persons room. the hotel required us to pay RMB 180 for an extra bed/night. ouuchh,,.. we are so not prepared for this. after negotiation with the management, they required us to pay RMB 50/night for all the extra towel, soap, toothpaste that we dont need.. annoying (it was not sent to our room until we asked for it).. hikss

despite all, we are quite satisfied with the hotel room. It is old, but still good. and the location is good. easy to find restaurant around the hotel. after taking our late dinner,, we were off to sleep and be prepared for tomorrow journey.. ;D

The very early mistake

On the very first hour of our trip,, we had make a mistake. So everybody was informed that Air asia terminal is located on terminal 3. But no one knows (or ONLY me??) that the international flights remained on Terminal 2.. hikss.. Fortunately, there was a kind man who voluntarily drive us to terminal 2 without any cost and without any bad motives.. I believe God always sent His angel to His kid who in need.. Thank Lord!

On vacation

hoorrayyy,, im going for a trip starting tomorrow till next week 16th aug. Its a three persons trip (me, mom and friend of her). We'll be visiting Guang Zhou, Shen Zhen, and Hongkong. ^o^ God bless the trip..!

sushi nites

its been a while we didnt eat sushi.. and last nite we went to gading coz by wants to go to 'animachi'..oh yes, his sudden craze over dragon ball isnt over.. but sadly he got nothing there,, it seems more expensive than multi toys. so we rushed over sushi tei and thankfully we are the last customer.. ^^

its a lovely sushi nites,,..

Definitely want NDS...!!

i have decided to reward myself a gift since i have... !@#$%^&* oh yeah,, i have been working for one year in this company.. =D and tadaaaa,, this is it.. **Pink NDS lite**


wait me up in hongkong till i get ya beib.. ^^

by's sudden craze

it was last nite,after we enjoyed KFC in MOI. we stopped by at Multi toys.. and I dunno how it happens, suddenly he was crazily scrapping around a box full of dragon ball egg.. 5 mins passed,, 15 mins,, half an hour and he is still not done.. So i left him and walk around the mall by myself.. when i came back, he is still undisturbed.. to kill my boredom,, i had this little photo sessions.. ^^

**Treasure Hunt**

**Yayy,, i found them**^^

**me on the waiting mode**

Hunting shoes...

its by hunting shoes month.. we've been thru mall to mall, store to store for finding a perfect shoes for him.. i went from excited to exhausted helping him to choose.. i just realize men are now the same with women when comes to shopping.. maybe because too many brands and models existed,, but for me man shoes are all looks alike-- boring,,..^^



so even untill today,, he hasnt fell in love with any..so i took him to pants section to find him some jeans.. he finally picked one from louis with 50% disc which only costs 129.500,-.. =D

Sabat A Farewell

another year had passed being with these kids,, they are all so special to me and i hate to say good bye.. never had enough of their sincerity that shows in many unexpected ways.. these kids helps me interact openly with them,, they freely show whats on their mind without many considerations as the grown up often does.. in which make me stay comforts being with them... ^^ Thank God for the opportunity to be able to taste the beauty of a child..

new hair style part II

my nu hair in may.. i permed my hair during my trip.. How it looks?

when your best friend get married,u will definitely...

♥be there on their wedding day even if u are left by a plane!!!! ^^

♥be her very honoured bridesmaid =p♥shot till u drop..♥still be the same person as u gals were (^__________^)♥and most importantly wish them to live a happy marriage life.. always and forever..

Granny visits

Granny came to visit us on jakarta during aunt 40th wedding anniv.. she's now almost 90th and healthy.. we are so proud of her..

*Three generations*

*Family gathering @ aunt house*